The Sudden Stop

“How did I let myself get talked into this crap?” Bobby stood at the edge of the rail and looked over to the river below. “Jesus! It is soooo freaking far down there! Please don’t make me do this! I am going to die right flipping here if you do not let me get back in the car! FOR REAL FOR REAL!!!” He stood there trembling looking at his date. He had just wanted to do something adventurous and fun. Like maybe taking a white water rafting trip, or hiking and camping in the woods or something. Not this…not this…NOT THIS!

“Oh don’t be such a baby.” The current love of his life, Pattie with an “ie” scolded him. She was, at least on the outside, just the type of woman who he would want. She answered his post on the freaking dating site and they went on a couple of dates before attempting this insanity. “You are not going to die. I mean I have done this a hundred times and it is just the most radical adrenaline rush. Only punks and babies do not find this fun.” She got up on the rail and jumped. The bungee cord made a loud cracking sound as it tightened and she let out a loud bellow that seemed unlikely for such a small girl.

Bobby let loose with his own scream because the cracking made him think that the bungee had come loose and she was plummeting to her death. This was definitely not fun and he wanted to go home. The only reason he came was because she told him that if he just came out and looked at it then he would probably hit a home run when they got back to the apartment. Maybe even a Grand Slam if he actually did it with her. Her sports metaphors for sex should have been the first sign that she was not the type for him. He always thought that badminton was altogether too much of a contact sport to play let alone intentionally plunging to your death at the end of a large rubber band. What if they measured him wrong and made the damn thing too long and he cracked his head on the rocks in the river below. Oh! Whoa is my stupid horny a-s-s!

The loud grunt that she gave out when she reached the end of the first jolting bounce came first followed immediately with what seemed like an earsplitting war cry. He ventured a peek over the edge and watched as she bounced and laughed and bellowed her delight. He stood back relieved and sat with his back to the stanchion holding the bridge up. He caught his breath and stood as they hauled her back over the side of the rail with safe, solid ground. She let them release her from the contraption holding her feet and did a victory dance like a football player in the end zone at the Super Bowl. She whooped and hollered and pumped her fists in the air. She shook he hair and laughed like an insane person. Bobby had never seen anything quite so sexy!

Finishing her revel, she grabbed Bobby by the arm and before he realized it had him secured in the boot contraption attached to the big rubber band. She told him that the guy would adjust the band to his size and his weight. He would be fine and got the guy running the contraption to confirm it. They boosted him up on the rail and he froze.

She coaxed him with promises of a night of erotic amazement. She told him that it would cure him of his Acrophobia. She told him that once the boots were on, they did not come off until after the jump. All of which meant nothing to him as he pleaded to be let down. Finally she told him to close his eyes, which already closed, and listen to her. She told him that she had been afraid of high places also and that made her feel sort of…less than. What she did was join the Army and volunteer for Airborne Jump School. She made it through and that was the last of her fear. Now she goes skydiving, bungee jumping, base jumping, and even dove off a cliff in Hawaii last year when she was on vacation. He asked her if Jump School taught her to relax and what the classes were about. She told him that she did fine until it came for her first jump from and airplane. He asked what happened. She told him that she froze in the door and would not jump. He asked her what happened then and she simply said “the Sargent put his hand on my shoulder and did this…” With that she reached up and pushed him off the bridge.

Only to discover that the guy rigging things had disassembled the rigging to make the adjustments and had not yet attached the other end of the bungee cord.

It ain't the fall...